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Now I will tell you what's new...
TO BE DETERMINED....
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What (elSe) is new?
Take a gander at the following lists that sorta popped up in my email at one point or another. Learn from them. Make them a part of your life. Live by them. ok. whatever. |
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THE MANTRA for New York City-ers
I NS T R U C T I O N S - F O R - L I F E
1. Take into account that great love and great achievements
involve great risk.
2. When you lose, don't lose the lesson.
3. Follow the three Rs :
Respect for self
Respect for others and
Responsibility for all your actions.
4. Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a
stroke of luck.
5. Learn the rules so you know how to break them properly.
6. Don't let a little dispute injure a great friendship.
7. When you realise you've made a mistake, take immediate
steps to correct it.
8. Spend some time alone every day.
9. Open your arms to change, but don't let go of your values.
10. Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.
11. Live a good, honourable life. Then when you get older
and think back, you'll be able to enjoy it a second time.
12. A loving atmosphere in your home is the foundation for
your life.
13. In disagreements with loved ones, deal only with the
current situation. Don't bring up the past.
14. Share your knowledge. It's a way to achieve immortality.
15. Be gentle with the earth.
16. Once a year, go someplace you've never been before.
17. Remember that the best relationship is one in which your
love for each other exceeds your need for each other.
18. Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.
19. Approach love and cooking with reckless abandon.
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How About Some thoughts...
Here are some (drum roll, please)
(....but FIRST!!!....click on this link to download a great SpongeBob Squarepantsscreensaver for your personal computer!!!!....NOW....back to the thoughts!!!)
CHILDREN'S BOOKS THAT DIDN'T MAKE IT:
1. You Are Different and That's Bad
2. The Boy Who died from eating all his vegetables
3. Dad's New Wife Timothy
4. Fun four-letter Words to Know and Share
5. Hammers, Screwdrivers and Scissors: An I-Can-Do-it-Book
6. The Kids' Guide to Hitchhiking
7. Kathy Was So Bad Her Mom Stopped Loving Her
8. Curious George and the High-Voltage Fence
9. All Dogs go to Hell
10. The Little Sissy who Snitched
11. Some Kittens Can Fly
12. That's it, I'm putting You Up for Adoption
13. Grandpa Gets a Casket
14. The Magic World Inside the Abandoned Refrigerator
15. Garfield Gets Feline Leukemia
16. The Pop-Up Book of Human Anatomy
17. Strangers Have the Best Candy
18. Whining, Kicking and Crying to Get your Way
19. You were an Accident
20. Things Rich Kids Have, But You Never Will
21. Pop! Goes the Hamster...And Other Great Microwave Games
22. The Man in the Moon is Actually Satan
23. Your Nightmares are Real
24. Where Would You Like to be Buried?
25. Eggs, Toilet Paper, and Your School
26. Why Can't Mr. Fork and Ms. Electrical Outlet be Friends?
27. Places Where Mommy and Daddy Hide Neat Things
28. Daddy Drinks Because You Cry
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Some More thoughts.....
1. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
2. If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be "meetings".
3. There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness."
4. People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.
5. And when God, who created the entire universe with all of its
glories, decides to deliver a message to humanity, He WILL NOT use, as His messenger, a person on cable TV with a bad hairstyle exhorting you to send money.
6. You should not confuse your career with your life.
7. No matter what happens, somebody will find a way to take it too seriously.
8. When trouble arises and things look bad, there is always one
individual who perceives a solution and is willing to
take command. Very often, that individual is crazy.
9. Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.
10. Never lick a steak knife.
11. Take out the fortune before you eat the cookie.
12. The most powerful force in the universe is gossip.
13. You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and compelling reason why we observe daylight savings time.
14. You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that very moment.
15. There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people to make a big deal about your birthday. That time is age 16.
16. The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age,
gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that,
deep down inside, we ALL believe that we are above average drivers.
17. The main accomplishment of almost all organized protests is to annoy people who are not in them.
18. A person who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person.
19. Your friends will love you, anyway. . .no matter what!
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TOP 10 REASONS TO DO AN ANAGRAM WITH THE NAME BRIAN JOSEPH PATRICK HARTIG....
10. A jerk in its bright approach.
9. Eighth brain a jock-strap rip.
8. Pig jock-strap breath in hair.
7. Approaching jerk, it's a birth.
6. Bright jerk, it is an approach.
5. A bright piranhas jerk topic.
4. I jerk bright approach saint.
3. Bigot piranhas jerk rich pat.
2. Brain pig the jock-strap hair.
And the Top Reason for doing an anagram on my name is:
1. I jerk this approaching brat.
TA-DAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!
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